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Me and the roommate just found a Westinghouse Type RS 275 Watt UV Sunlamp from the 1950s in the basement. "You can be SURE ... if it's Westinghouse!" A self-contained source of beneficial ultraviolet!
"The manufacturer makes no claims as to the effectiveness of the ultraviolet radiation of this lamp for the maintenance of health, this being entirely the province of the medical profession."
CAUTION, it says:
1. Do not use too long an exposure time (do not sleep under lamp).
2. Do not operate lamp too close to skin.
3. Do not look directly into the lamp.
4. Do not operate this lamp on D-C.

That's right. It's a goddamn cancer lamp. DARE I GIVE IN TO CURIOSITY AND PLUG IT IN?
Science marches onward.
"The manufacturer makes no claims as to the effectiveness of the ultraviolet radiation of this lamp for the maintenance of health, this being entirely the province of the medical profession."
CAUTION, it says:
1. Do not use too long an exposure time (do not sleep under lamp).
2. Do not operate lamp too close to skin.
3. Do not look directly into the lamp.
4. Do not operate this lamp on D-C.

That's right. It's a goddamn cancer lamp. DARE I GIVE IN TO CURIOSITY AND PLUG IT IN?
Science marches onward.